8 Weeks Unedited

My stomach muscles are changing.  They don't work quite right, like they do when they aren't separated to make room.  Danny can't get comfortable on my lap the same way anymore.  His little sibling has already started pushing him out of the way.  And Danny is already quite comfortable squishing said sibling by sitting on him/her.  I'm out of all of my regular pants and I've packed up three fourths of my shirts.  Tuesday is the first doctor's appointment.  I can't wait to hear that heartbeat! I slept through the night last night.  For the first time in over a week.  I'm eating well - and by that I mean healthily - but not drinking enough water.  I'm still exercising three times a week, and the other day I got to do so with 2 other pregnant women.  That made it 3 times more fun.  We are all due within 8 weeks of each other.  Still no nausea, the gag reflex has calmed down some, and I can at least stay awake now between 1 and 4 p.m., though I'm still not functional.  I'm really dying to know if it's twins.  I might be obsessing over this.  I've always wanted a pair of skinny jeans to wear with black boots.  My first pair ever are a borrowed pair of maternity skinny jeans.  Maternity skinny jeans.  Now there's an oxymoron.  But I'm in love with them and I might wear them for the next 7 months.

The End.

Sunday Morning Conversation

Mommy, can I play with this?

No, we don't play with the battery charger.

I wanna play with the badger charger!

No, it's not to play with.  Put it away.

I wanna fix the batties.

Honey, there aren't even any batteries there to fix.

Why?

Uncontrollable giggling on my part at the ridiculousness of the conversation.

Uncontrollable giggling on his part for my reaction.

Mommy I wanna watch Mickey Mousey.  Pleeeeeeease!!!! (in the highest pitch voice, that makes him sound like a mouse.

Oh, alright, come here.

Five minutes later when my husband came home and Danny was watching Mickey Mouse on YouTube:  Papa, you came home?

Yeah, Bubba, I'm back.

Oh.  That's greeeeeeeaaaaaaaat!  (In the cheesiest 3 year old voice you ever have heard.

And I lost it in a fit of laugher once again.

6 Weeks, 6 Days

So, yup, I'm pregnant!  :-D  Thank you all so much for your well wishes and prayers and celebrations!!  We are pretty stinkin' excited around here!!

So, I'm due (according to my own calculations) on May 2nd.  My mom and aunt are ecstatic about this, since it's their birthday!  (They are twins.)  My first appointment is next week, and I'm most excited to hear that little heart-beat and find out if indeed there are one or two babies inside.  For some reason, this time, I would not be the least bit surprised if it IS twins.

Freaked out, absolutely.  Surprised, not so much.

But let's not put the cart ahead the horse, shall we?  I'll let you know when I know.  ;-)

As for the gender, I will be so incredibly excited, no matter which it is!  I LOVE being the mom of a boy.  And I LOVE the idea of getting to be the mom of a girl, too.  And if I had to choose, I'd seriously not know what to pick.  So, like I said, I'll be stoked and not the teensiest bit disappointed, no matter what!

I'm feeling really good these days!  I'm - wait let me look at the app on my phone - 6 weeks and 6 days pregnant.  Dontcha' love technology!?  I'm in WAY better physical fitness than I was last pregnancy, so I think that's helping me a lot.  I have had very little nausea, although my gag reflex is quite sensitive.  I just about lost it in Subway today when describing something gross to my husband.  And forget cleaning out the refrigerator.  I become completely dysfunctional between 1p.m. and 4p.m. each and every afternoon.  Fortunately, this is Danny's nap time.  Unfortunately, this is when I used to work.  So, I'm having to do a little re-structuring of my day.  Okay, a lot, actually.  I am sore in all the most predictable places and I'm already sleeping with a pillow between my knees.  I see a chiropractor regularly and exercise 3 times a week, so that makes a HUGE difference!  I absolutely LOVE my chiropractor!  The woman has a serious gift of healing.  You can check her out here.  I have to pee constantly, and carrying Danny is becoming uncomfortable.  Not to mention my clothes.  Uncomfortable.  I've already got quite the little bump.  Well, it's noticeable to ME, at least.  ;-)

(It took me 10 or 12 weeks to get to this last time!)

Danny's noticing the growth of my tummy as well.  Today he spontaneously came up to me and patted my abdomen with his right hand.  He said, "Mama, please be careful.  The baby's growing and growing!"  It was too cute for words!  Then he said that the baby is "this big!" and held his hands about a foot apart.  Then we told him the baby was actually about "this big," holding our fingers about half an inch apart.  He seemed sort of in awe about that.

Then at Subway, he said, "Mama's tummy is getting bigger and bigger!"

He definitely understands there's a baby inside!  I think one of the funnest thing about this is going to be watching Danny's understanding grow and change.  I am loving this process already!!   

Danny Has A Surprise

If you don't have time for all of it, just watch the last 60 seconds. I promise it's worth it. ;-)

Preschool Wisdom

Danny, pointing to the Bible:  "That's God and Jesus.  Jesus is God."

"That's right, kiddo.  I'm impressed that you've got that put together."

Still pointing.  "That's God, Jesus, the paints."  Pointing to the pile of paint supplies on our bedroom floor there from the remodel project still in process.

"Hmm.  Well, I'm not sure how the paints fit into the picture, but um...  Okay."

1 a.m. and Unedited

I can only take her in small doses at times of the day when it doesn't matter if I'm able to compose myself or not.  It's not that she's a bad writer.  She's a fantastically brilliant writer, actually.  It's because I can only handle the life that is her existence in little doses.  It's just too much sometimes.  ...I know.  She probably wishes she could take it in little doses too.  It's sure not fair.

And she's crazy strong.  And a damn good mom.

I've been reading other blogs again a lot lately.  I think it's part of finding my voice again.  My writer's voice that is.

Don't ever set aside one of your deepest passions in order to "concentrate on work" for a while.  Not even for a little while.  It's just not worth it.  I didn't mean to do this.  To set aside one of my deepest passions for the sake of a career.  It just happened because that career holds another one of my deepest passions, and it made sense at the time.  Now I know. Lesson learned.  It won't happen again.

I just this lady's pasta salad.  It was yummy.  And now I want Doritos.  I do miss her open heart spilling out all over the page.  But I admire even more her perseverance and her heart for serving her husband and honoring his desire to keep their relationship private.  For someone who likes to spill their bloody and bleeding heart all over the page for all the world to read - oh wait, that's me - it's not easy to keep one's mouth shut.  Good job, lady.  I'm proud of you.

I will resist the Doritos.  I will resist the Doritos.

Goodnight.

What She Said

Two years ago on September 11, I wrote this post.

This year, I couldn't possibly express my thoughts any better than my friend Ashley did.  So, I'll just defer to her words and let you read what she wrote.

First Day of Preschool

This morning while getting Danny dressed for preschool in his favorite motorcycle t-shirt, jean shorts and his little red Croc tennis shoes, he said, "Danny's growing up!"

"Yes, sweet pea, you sure are!! How old are you?" I asked.

"Only ten," he replied without batting an eye lash.  This is his answer to this question every. Single. Time.

"And how old is Papa?" asked my husband, as he pulled him over to the sink to give him "spiky hair."

"Six," said the older, wiser Danny.

"Oh, I see.  And Mama?" continued Alejandro.

"Only four,"  said my little actually-three-year-old preschooler.

"That's right!" said my husband wisely. "You remember that, boy!"

And then, out the door with giggles and talk of friends and toys and a stop at the front door for the obligatory first-day-of-school picture.

Then kisses and hugs for Papa and piling into the car and Danny and I backed down the driveway.  Upon arrival, Danny found his way through the front door and down the hall to the correct classroom without my help.  He waited patiently for the door to open, and didn't hesitate to be the first to walk inside, as though he'd been doing this for years.  He then made a bee-line for the (you guessed it) trucks.  

"Baby, mama's gonna go now, okay?"  

"Mama's gonna go over there?" he pointed across the room. 

"No, Mama's gonna go home and I'll be back to get you for lunch, okay?"  

"Okay."  

A kiss, a hug, and off I went.  The ease of it sorta' makes me hesitate and my eyes start to well, but it didn't surprise me one bit. 

He's more than ready for this.  

And I am now home with a quiet house and two solid uninterrupted hours to do whatever. I. Want.  

Aaaaaaah.....

Dear Danilo,

You turned 3 years old two months ago, and when Papa took you to the grocery store to pick out a cake for you and him to eat, you picked pink.  That's right.  Pink cake and pink icing.  You crack me up, kid!  And anyone who is as boy as you are can afford to pick whatever color cake you want.  Boy oh boy, are you into your trucks, trains, and airplanes.  Lately, you talk most about cement trucks, steam rollers, "diggers," backhoes, tractors, cranes and anything else found on a construction site.  You regularly ask me to pull over by the construction sites on the way home from the gym to watch for 15-20 minutes.  And when it's time to leave, you cheerfully holler, "Goodbye truck!!  Thank you!!"  It's seriously the cutest thing ever.

You are WAY into band-aids and tonight you had one on your "belbow" (elbow).  You like to nurse any injury you can as long as it brings you attention, a bear hug from mama, and doesn't actually hold you back from playing.  I'm going to be sad when you start saying "elbow" instead of "belbow" and "excuse me" instead of "mooks me."  It's so darn cute it's very hard to teach you not to interrupt us when saying it!  You have lately begun to let us know when you think our tone is out of line, or we're being too harsh with the dog.  Sometimes you are right - which is the mostly humbling thing a parent can experience, let me just tell you - and sometimes we have to have a discussion about being bossy and who's the mama or papa.

You LOVE books and are more and more into them now that you are following story-lines more in depth.  Your preferred language is definitely English, but you catch a lot more in Spanish than we seem to give you credit for, and last month when Tita was here for 3 1/2 weeks, you two had no trouble communicating with each other.

You ask "why," and tell long, detailed stories, recounting events in the correct order with (usually) the correct details.  You are particularly good at telling how loud the trains in New Mexico were and how you hold your hands in a diving position to swim.  Speaking of swimming lessons, you can float on your back in the water for a full five seconds unaided, though not comfortable or relaxed.  You are able to blow bubbles with your face and ears submerged and you are comfortable with a swim cap and goggles and kick-kick-kicking across the pool.

In or out of the water, you are fantastic at make-believe.  Today you were so convincing when you told me to hand you the water hose from your bedroom wall that I reached right up and grabbed it.  And then I got into the "boat" that you ordered me into and started "moving the water" (rowing) just like the captain directed!

You like music and you love to sing at the top of your lungs.  You can sing the words (some of them) to the Bob the Builder theme song.

You are pretty good at cleaning up, as long as I fire directions at you fast enough so you don't have time to get distracted and lay on the praise thick between each direction.  Oh, except that you insist on cupping your hand like a back hoe in order to pick up every. single. toy.  So, it sometimes takes a leeetle longer.  And sometimes I have to threaten to put the "digger" on time out.  So then you make believe unattatch the digger from the crane and change your method of picking up toys, thankfully.

The bedtime routine has settled down again (phew!) and is usually pretty smooth.  You love it when we gently touch your back with our fingertips just before falling asleep.  You also ask for this when you wake up early and crawl into our bed until we're ready to get up.  It cracks me up, because you wake up and fall asleep just. like. me.  It's sort of ridiculous, but at least we understand each other and you are gentle with me in the morning.  With Papa?  You are not gentle.  Which is hilarious to me.  Not so much to him.

Tomorrow is pre-school orientation and Thursday is your first full day of pre-school.  I'm a little baffled at how we got here already.  Because yesterday you were barely crawling.  You're ready for it, though.  I'm excited to see how you will grow and learn through this new experience and the friends you will make.  You often ask to go to Jazzercise to play with friends, or to church to run around the sanctuary at top speed chasing Wilson and Lillian before and after church. So I'm certain pre-school will be a big hit.  You are starting in the class just younger than you - that's the only opening right now - and so everyone should be just about your size, since you are a head smaller than most kids your age.  Not that you let that phase you one tiny iota.  But I think this will be a good place to start.

You still crawl up into my arms when you are tired or sad.  You wrap your arms around my neck and rest your head on my shoulder.  This morning during a sleepy bout of Bob-The-Builder cartoons, you hugged my arm and said, "I love-a-you too, Mama!"  And then I fell to pieces on the floor.

I love you, Bubba.  Oh, how I love you, too.