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October 1, 2015

Fifteen Minutes on the Kitchen Floor

So I'm sitting on the kitchen floor reading this - http://momastery.com/blog/2015/09/30/the-erasing/ - and tears are rolling down my cheeks. The three of us - Danny, Gianni, and I slept late today. We had a big day yesterday. A good day. Filled with hard work and victories and lessons learned. It was a GOOD day. So today we slept late and we were tender to ourselves this morning (I love how she says that) and instead of school or chores or errands, we stopped for 15 minutes and they played with kinetic sand on the kitchen floor while I read this article. And I cried. And I remembered. I remembered when I used to write like this. I remembered how I have been in the expanse of nothingness and felt nothing but gray as she says. I realized how I am very much in the newness and beginning to live again and learning things all over again. Tears fall for the months which turn into several years lost to the gray. And in joy they fall for the newness that I feel again. Be tender with yourself today. Know that He loves you and designed you to thrive. Do the hard work to press through to victory today! I promise it's worth it.